For nearly a decade, Shanie and her husband David have been transforming children’s lives through fostering.
With backgrounds in education, criminal justice, and emergency services, the couple bring both compassion and experience to foster care.
During their journey with Orange Grove, they have helped keep many siblings together, going above and beyond to make a difference for children, and showing how life-changing fostering really can be.
A change of career
Shanie had worked in the education sector and the criminal justice system for 30 years before deciding to leave her busy career to become a foster parent. With her desire to help transform children’s lives combined with many transferable skills for fostering – alongside her husband David who works as a Firefighter – she knew that it was the right time to apply their skills and passion to help foster children.
“Fostering was always something I wanted to do. I enjoy working with children and it’s about making a difference. With my career history, I felt I had so much to offer children who’d been in care and to try to help them.”
Shanie reflected on how the skills and experience she’d built up in her life had helped her in her fostering journey: “I think having had a quite varied work background – I was a teacher for many years and also worked in the custodial system, and my husband being a firefighter – we found the skills we’ve brought from our jobs have been useful in fostering.
“Working in education and working with looked after children in my role, it has helped me understand that side and it helped me to navigate the system as well as advocate for the children, especially in respect of their educational needs.”
Being close to retirement age never put Shanie and David off taking their first step in to fostering. Shanie added: “I think you’re never too old to do anything you enjoy doing. We’ve still got lots of energy, and I think working with children keeps you young generally.”
Support from Orange Grove
Shanie considered several fostering agencies before deciding to apply to foster with Orange Grove. She shared more about the things that helped her make her decision:
“I decided to foster with Orange Grove because of the support in place and the fact that there is more resource. I’ve got lots of experience of other people that foster with other agencies and local authorities. And, for me, it was the support around you, such as the family support worker, social workers with smaller caseloads who can give more time to you – there’s always someone there if you need them. And they’ve all been committed to doing the best job for the children and to support us to do the best job.”
For Shanie, the reassurance of knowing help was always available made her feel confident caring for sibling groups as well as young people with more complex needs.
She explained: “One of the things that I found helpful from Orange Grove is that we’re not only supported by our social worker, but the manager, the team – everyone really knows the foster carers. And there are a lot of networking events, so you get to know other foster carers, other staff, so you always have that support around you.”
Shanie and David were also impressed with the support offered to children at Orange Grove:
“There are networking events for us but also for our children as well. Halloween parties, pantomimes, picking pumpkins… So our children can meet other children in similar circumstances as themselves and not feel so different. It’s lovely for us all to be able to do those events.”
Keeping siblings together
Shanie and David currently care for a young brother and sister. But prior to this they have cared for many sibling groups – including making an exemption in order to offer a home to a sibling group of three alongside a child already in their care. Caring for four children under the age of ten was certainly a challenge for the couple, but they recognised the importance of helping children remain with their siblings so put themselves forward.
While sibling groups can bring extra challenges, Shanie and David felt the emotional rewards far outweighed them. Shanie talked more about the difference fostering siblings can make:
“I think it’s really important to keep siblings together where it’s possible because that’s their only connection to each other and to their family. We had a sibling group of three little children and keeping them together meant that they felt much more safe and secure, as that was all they knew.”
“Understanding their bond and realising, even though they may struggle sometimes, their siblings are their support network. It’s their identity, their connection. So it’s about making sure that you enable them to keep that connection even when it gets tough.”
First experiences
An incredibly rewarding part of fostering is giving children their first experiences. Many activities or achievements that we may take for granted within a typical childhood, are things that a foster child may never have had the chance to experience.
For Shanie, this is one of the most special parts of being a foster parent.
“I think some of the most special moments we’ve had since fostering have been being able to give children experiences they’ve never had. Our children had never been on a train. They’d never been to museum. One of the children had never had a birthday cake before. And, giving them those first-time experiences, it’s amazing. Seeing a child first learn to swim. Seeing a child’s eyes light up seeing Father Christmas for the first time. The excitement of a child opening their first ever birthday present. All those experiences and memories will stay with these children. With us.”
“And special moments can vary. We cared for a boy who had a very difficult background. But we supported him and he got through school, through his A-Levels, and into university. And seeing him graduate, it was just amazing. There have been several occasions where I’ve thought, oh my goodness, I’ve really helped someone.”
‘People should consider fostering‘
It’s hard to count all the ways Shanie and David have changed the lives of children. Through their love and dedication, they have made an enormous difference to, not only the quality of each child’s life, but also to the future that is now possible for them because of their decision to foster.
Shanie shares her experience and advice for those who may be thinking of fostering too:
“If I was asked to sum up my fostering experience, I think it’s been a whole lot of learning, quite a lot of worry, but lots and lots of laughs and fun. Fostering is so rewarding. And you learn so much every day. We’ve learned an awful lot about ourselves and about the children we care for. You learn that you can’t fix everything, but you can make a difference. I think my fostering experience has been one of the biggest learning experiences of my life.”
“I think people should consider fostering because there are so many children that need your help out there. It’s a job, it’s a devotion. And it’s also a really rewarding life experience. If you’ve got the time and space, it’s a wonderful thing to be part of.”
Are you inspired by Shanie’s fostering story? To learn more about becoming a foster parent, call our enquiries team on 0800 369 8513, or fill in our online enquiry form, and we’ll send you all the information you need.
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